E DON HAPPEN OHHH!!!
I Told you beautiful people before to watch out for my new wedding planning company...
Glory be to God, i have finally started the journey of wedding consultations. Despite previous experience in Event planning & wedding consultations i decided that it was about time that i made it into a business.
So here it is my people... i have been waiting for donkey years to finally launch this site so without further adieu i present to you beautiful people:
www.Divinenuptials.org *clap hands* loll
Ohhh im so excited belieeevvvee me! FINALLY i could do something that I LOVE
So Divine Nuptials? what do you think of the name? The Divine bit was inspired by me... named it after my first daughter (i don't have any kids as of now but when i get my first baby girl, she'll know this site was dedicated to her) i'm soppy i know, i don't need reminding loll...
The Nuptials bit was my boyfriends idea... we needed another word for wedding soo yeahhh DIVINE NUPTIALS !!!
So what do we do:
Well we plan your wedding that's what we do mattteee!!
lol well there is a lot more to it than that sha,
We are involved in consultation, where we discuss, organize, plan and design everything from your wedding dress to invitations and of course your Big Day!
We search for the appropriate vendors, and provide you with any suppliers you may need.. be it catering, DJ, live band, alaga's ect ect
We are optimize time as well & very INEXPENSIVE so whether you be Rich Man Pickin or Simple Pako Boy who wan wed we can work what ever you have got and ensure that your wedding day is an organised, personal and breath taking experience.
Note the as for now we only work within the UK but would soon be branching international... thank God for me ohhh!!!
Anyway if you are getting married or you know someone that is getting married and you want all the wohala to be put in my head so you can relax and enjoy your Big Day Email us on divinenuptials@hotmail.com or just check out our website... (i'm getting excited again).. *clears throat*www.divinenuptials.org
Okayy Ohh... WATCH THIS VIDEO... very intresting:
So my people,
How u guys find am..?
Interracial relationships... Multicultural Companionship... Oyingbo jam Dudu?
It's funny cause i came across the this other video recently and it got me thinking aswell, unfortunately you can only see it via face book so take a look at this link: https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1963559021783
Well after seeing it, i began to think... White man marry black babe like me... Wetin dey now? Back in the days when i started 'dating' my mum sat me down and told me the ground rules, there were pretty simple at the time:
1) Don't spoil yourself (no sex)
2) Don't befriend a non believer
3) Don't befriend oyingbo
I remember them days when she recited those her 3 Commandments and for my mind no wohala, no long ting. But as i got abit older i was able to get a greater understanding of why she said that i should have sex or "spoil myself" like she rightfully put it lol because of the christian teaching of avoiding all forms of sexual immorality including pre marital sex... plus the risk of carrying belle and all that razz, i got it... i understood why she said that i should remain in my christian roots when dating and not date an unbeliever because of the biblical teaching that tells us not to get unequally yoked and besides the idea of my pickin being a wetin dey call am these days ehhhh "chrislum" half christian and half muslim just made nooo sense to me, the whole thing was kolo considering that despite popular beliefs Christianity and islam do not support each other, you can not serve Allah and serve God who came as flesh as Jesus Christ... buuuuttt that a topic for next time... but yeaahh.. however what if i met one fine white man like that who was a believer in Christ? Wetin my mama go say? Beside wasn't that racist!?
Sooo after years of thinking my mumzie may have been racist i finally gathered all my courage to can and quietlllyyy confront her, making sure i give her a 4meter gap just in case she tried to land slap for my face at any point of our conversation... However the revelation i got shocked me well well. What i came to realize was that it wasn't anything to do with the skin color at all but the fear of her children's children having a diluted culture. You see the Nigerian culture is one of the few things us as Nigerians have hold on too for centuries.. it is linage, our cooking, our music, our vibrant dance, our literature, our language, our lingos, our ceremonies, our rituals even down to how we bring up our children.
There are just unwritten traditions that has passed on from generations to generations that have allowed us to survive for this long, survive and still be strong. For instance, ask any naija kid, if you go to a older family friends house you don't just hold out your hand and greet them "hello gbenga, wassup?" ehhhhnnn the man would look at you as if you were something that commot for his nyash! Ahhnn you wan mek him deal wit you. Wolahi!! in fact by the time that man has finished with you, your ikegbe kuku become pancake nyash, i sorry for you! But u de feel me? them sort of situation u prostrate or bow and you greet dem referring to as UNCLE and greet them very formally, either in your language or in english. That is just one example... Soo my mumzie was explaining to me that to teach alllllll these small small traditions and cultures to white people would be tedious for both them and yourself, because there culture is pretty laid back, so much so that they come across like they don't have much of a culture unless it entails going to the pub or have sunday roast lol..
After her talk i came to realize that it had nothing at all to do with racism but rather fear.. fear of having a generation of nigerians that didn't really know who they were as BLACK AFRICANS. Lets keep this ting real here, truth be told even if you got a british passport or a american passport you are firstly AFRICAN before you are an american or british and God Forbid they want to send us back to our land we got to stop decieving ourselves and realize that really and truly this land we are living in whether it be america or uk or somewhere else in Europe does not belong to us! I deh lie?!?! Soooo it was the dominating fear of having her gran kids not know who they really where as Nigerians that made her make that her final commandments... but things have changed since then, cultures are more excepting, i believe personally that you can marry a white american and they would embrace your culture as a Nigerian wholeheartedly and teach it to your children and vise versa.. it all depends on how determined you are to not loose your culture, and also if your other half is willing to learn your culture as much as you want to learn his or hers....
Funny thing is that there is culture clash even among the Nigerian Race itself, Trust me. I am from Edo state a place called Auchi and 99% of my friends are Yoruba... living in london where Yoruba people run tingz unlike the US where Ibo people are the baba's it can get very isolating for a simple edo girl like me... because at uni, at home, at church they all tend to forget that i don't speak yoruba like they do so once in a while i got to remind them that i have no single idea what they are talking about so translate please lolll... if you're lucky like me to have understanding friends it could be alot easier but if not it can still be very annoying... listen, even my boyfriend although we are both from edo state he grew up there and i did not... so i am still very much diluted in my understanding of culture and how a Nigerian Girlfriend is suppose to be like but again he simple teaches me...
In relationships there is nothing more great than to have a man that is a great teacher and to have a woman that is a great learner... Wisdom can be passed on by teaching and willing to be taught... Whether or not you are a man or a woman it is vital that if you decide to get involve in an interracial relationship or even an intercultural relationship that BOTH of you are willing to adapt and still maintain a healthy level of the other one's culture... listen joh, i have met some mixed race chicks that rap in Yoruba yet cook Sunday roasts and Yorkshire puddings loll
LOL!! Okay!! Okayyy!! I know i just wrote a blog 10minute ago or so but i just came across this video that send me LAUGHING OFF MY CHAIR!! This video wan mek i choke of complete laughter! See am for yourself:
LOOOL!! How u see am now?... lol.. Funny thing is that one of the requirements is that each contestant has ATLEAST a secondary school qualification .. after hearing this one i no fit laugh tayaaa!! How many of themgo visit one useless principle like that so he could forge secondary school qualification in exchange for a few "favors" ... lol.. Nawwwaaa Ohh!!! Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria Ko!! Abeeeegggggg-ee!!
Me sef i soon go audition for my own beauty pageant.. we go see who be Miss Nigeria lool..
First thing is First... Listen to this jam, if u no fit rock to this song, i sorry for you: Sooo who wan wed one day one day??
I know some of you de think that i too rush rush but noooo.. no be like that, me ehn when it comes to my wedding day it WILL BE the best day of my life... i can not put up with half half satisfaction!
Now wetin de mek me say this?
Well, sheh u know this month na the start of the wedding season, so far i don go 3 wedding this month and have 2 more invites for the start of July and by going to all these wedding I have learnt plenty about weddings... the preparation needed.. courtship and even about marriage. But mek i begin with what i have learnt personally about having the "perfect" wedding...
1) Organisation: If you and your man don't take the time to organize it well, una go give yourself stress related blood pressure SIMPLE! Everything.. and i meeeaannn e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g should be organised... don't confuse me oh, i no say you two should act electronically to all you de do but have a mental note of what needs to be done and when!
2) Timing: NIGERIAN TIME NA CURSE!!! I don tayyyyaaa for the numerous weddings i have gone to were the Bride is late or the food is late or the speakers are late... i taya my dear! And wetin de piss me off the most is when they now use "Nigerian time" as some sort of legitimate excuse!! Oyingbo wedding, they say starts at 11am e go start 11am not 2pm! I don't understand ohhh... remember: Time Na Money
3) Food: Okay Okay Okay... If una get bad DJ... that can be forgiven. If una can not decorate the place well.. that can be forgiven. If una Best Man can not say a Best Man Speech without blabbering on and on and onnnn about your upcoming wedding night full of sex... even that can be forgiven... But if una can not feed everyone that takes the time to come to your wedding... THAT ONE DE WORI ME PASS!!!!
Kai! Mek i no anger some people but all i ask is for the basics: Jellof rice, Plaintain & Chicken.. with mineral... Ahn Ahn! I rather una spend most of the money on catering than on Live Band or Favors! ... Oya, mek i tell you my master plan... CALLINGALL NIGERIANS: Learn to appreciate the art of INVITATION ONLY at least that way everyone has an allocated table and an allocated plate full of amazing food .. Think about it... if you're having buffet and an open invitation, plan to cater for 700 people if you only invited 500.. Believe me..
4) Personal touch: This part na for people who have a little more to spend. Adding you and your man little personal touches into each bit could make a good wedding reception great, and the guest could learn a little bit more of you as a couple rather than just you as a person or him as an individual... it enhances the whole "now two have become one" ideology.
And Be Creative!
5) Money: Mek i tell you somethiinngg... Even poor man can marry oh!... No just be a rich man thing howeverrr it is VITAL that una save money to have the wedding that you want. If na just marriage u wan do, no quams whether or not the wedding is spectacular, fair enough, una marry.. get blessing.. do nice & simple reception and enjoy marriage life but if una want a spectacular wedding to start of a spectacular marriage i advice you to start saving from NOW... me i started saving from 12 years of age... i still don't have much saved cus my hand too de scratch me and always seems to dip into my savings but from now on i go save am because i really want the wedding that i have been dreaming about since my mama carry me for belle.
But don't get it twisted, Amazing reception areas... Amazing DJ... Amazing decor doesn't have to mean Amazing salary.. it all requires a lot of searching, hustling and negotiation... wedding planning business na like market business... if u no price market, market man go cheat you dry.
6) Services: You be surprised of who you kno that can help you. Whether that na auntie that have wedding cake business or uncle that has photographing business you be surprised who you know. HOWEVER... Mek i warn you well well! Mek una shine your eyeeess well well.. if you want to use your connections to assist your Big Day, you better KNOW for sure that they will not let you down! I have been to weddings where Aunty Funke or Aunty Bolaji (these names are completely made up btw, no one in particular) would offer to make 5 coolers of Jellof rice without charge and when that day now comes she only makes 2 and to put salt for wound she now uses Basmati rice to mek am.. everyone de complain and you sef no like am but wetin u go do?! Na free abi? so beggers can not be choosers. Personally, i prefer hiring out a professional when it came to food but if i decided to use the help of a friend or a family i would choose some one that i know for SURE is up to the task...
7) Wedding Planner: Weddings can be wohala, trust me! Planning them can be enjoyable but also very tedious. My own advice is that you get a wedding planner.. it is an upcoming business and time don pass when only oyingbo people are wedding planners and the charge for a simple consultation is enough to shop for a month worth of food... These days you have Nigerians as wedding planners.. that specializes on not just the organisation of the reception but also co ordinates the traditional ceremony as well, with the ability to supply you and your groom with contacts of Alaga's, Nigerian caterers, Nigerian DJ's & Live Band and Venues that would allow you to bring your own caterers for instance, I recently began a course where i would soon qualify as a UK registered wedding planner, and with the few weddings that i have co-organised i know that wedding planning na tough work.. so my dear even if u don't want to have a wedding planner, i advice you to at least plan your wedding with a close friend or sister or even your mother, put that wohala on some one elses head.
8) PRAY & RELAX:Na your weddddiinnngg day! Make sure you pray hard the night before and when the D-day comes God shall protect you and your husband from any jealous eyes. Try not to be a Bridezilla... try and enjoy the day... save up all that energy that you would use stressing out over things... besides, you need all the energy you can muster up for that night .. hehe.. lol...
Keep your eyes open for my own time to shine... My wedding planning business shall kick off soon.
Long time Ohhh!! Longest EVER time.. forgive me abeg with juggling placements, work and essays I didn't have the time to think talk of blog but I made time after escaping from the boring ends of Hertfordshire to the rough ghetto ends of London... A lot more danger but not boring sha!
Firstlyy... Mek una hear this jam...
So my man took me on a date last night..
Well I wouldn't call it a date sha, e be more like a evening walk that turned to quiet an experience.
He told me that he wasn't going to spend kobo taking me out but i would come home feeling like Dangonte.. I was like "Louis, u sefff!! Nawa for dis your sweet mouth oh"
but he gave me one of those Just Wait and See smiles.. so na so i see am oh.. in my mind he just to talk jazz but lets watch now.. Dangonte abi? loll
So we jump for bus without touchin in.. then commot for marble arch. "Wer we de go from here?"
See me see trouble oh, this boy was dragging me to the entrance of Hilton Park Lane Hotel.. "Wetin we de do for here?"
He just told me to keep quiet and act like I de flex... We now approached the door.. see oyinbo man open door for us, address ME.. small me as MADAME! my mouth won fall for ground oh,
'wetin de do you.. de no kno ur face oh, as far as they are concern u be dangonte's wifey... start to believe it!'
So as we went towards the reception I had to refrain from looking like one pako by "Ooo-ing" and "Ahhh-ing" at all the little riches planted around the hotel.
"Can i help you sir & madame" Seee respect oh!"
I looked at Louis, abeg ooh.. no shame for this people.. you better have a plan
Ekpami Oh!!!Louis wat kind of wohala u wan put me in... honeymoon suite?!... Fiancee?!(although mek i no lie , being called his Fiancee did my body some how.. totori quick catch me lol)
I quickly ripped the primark bracelet of my wrist that was making my primark ring look even more cheap... so with just the ring on, suddenly it was easy for this maga to confuse a £2.99 ring for £29,900.000 ring... I de tell you ohhh!!
"So as i was saying, me and my future wife would like to view some of the best honeymoon suites you people have... money is not a issue for us.. "
SEE HIM SCATTER DER HEAD!!! Oyingbo de look at us confused.. we looked like we just came out of one council estate but with this ridiculous confidence and the right use of English de no dare question us...
As they took us up to the top of the Hilton. I felt like i was committing a crime for just looking at the artefacts that was worth more than my house loll..
As the concierge showed us to the most expensive honeymoon suites i booooww!! See suite! After taking a look at the bedroom i began to wishhhhh that my honeymoon would start in this very room.. Ehhh!! If na soo!!! O boiiiii!! in fact my mouth no fit talk am! lol...
after the concierge rambled on bout how many nigerians come here and how they could order Nigerian food for Louis if his soul desired it, and how most "chief" Nigerians that come there dash him atleeeaasstt £50 tip for his help in my mind I was thinking 'if this maga now expects me to dash him £50, he de crazzee!!"
Once we enjoyed the feeling of being "rich" we now asked for the price for this suite for 2 nights.. by this time i don bite my tongue hard in order to refrain from the laughter of disbelief that i knew was going to come once i heard the price...
" Sir & Madame, you are lucky... it is actually cheaper that it usually is at this time of the year just a meagre £1760 for those two nights..."
EHHHWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!THAT IS ACAR.. THAT IS TWO TRIPS TONAIJA... THAT IS 3 OR EVEN 4 GUCCI BAGS.... THAT IS WHOLE YEAAARRRRR RENT!! £1760 TUFIAKWA!
But of course I kept all this out my expression sha..
"No kwams oga!"
louuiisss ooohh, he wan fall my hand speaking pigeon for this people..
"i mean no problem we shall go around and check out The Dochester, then Intercontinental & get back to you.."
By the time we got to Intercontinental Louis was demanding that they should be making Chinese food for there guests and not just french and english food... and the people were running around asking their staff if they knew where Dr Louis would be able to get some Chinese food... One of them offered to drive us to China town in the Hotel's Bentley... We no fit shout oh! So we told dem not to worry that we would walk their since we where were prestige visitors from Nigeria we would use that as an opportunity to sight see and probably go to Tiffany's to pick the rings for our "upcoming wedding" loool...
Basically the moral of the story or experience in this case was that you are what you think!
Behind them glass windows, people dat would usually act somehow towards us, since we were not rich respected us... it is sad sha that money bring respect but wat louis showed me was that it really about confidence!
Even if u go home and drink garri wen u de walk for road, hold ur head up and FEEL like your something, and u be something!
Me and my man no spend kobo but they treated me like i was Dagonte's wifey! I usually live my life depending on the situation of my pocket.. when money deh u go see me smillllee like nuffin do me.. i go dress like one madame but when money no der, u go see this make belief poverty written in my face... its not good!
Smile, Dress Good, and Feel Rich!it starts in the mind oh! People will respect u based on your confidence! Truth be told if i we started to talk razz pidgeon whilst we wer der dey would still respect us cus we made dem feel like we were MEANT to be there! Soo Enjoy life joh! Even if money no deh, e go betttttteeeeerrr!!! Act rich Act posh... Behave like one AjePako and u shall soon grow into AjeBota! Even Dagonte the richest man in Nigeria started somewhere... But first it all starts in the mind!
No wohala! Mek i bounce... My limo is waiting to take me and my bobo to Dubai, we are spending the weekend at the Burj Al Arab...No-Long-Ting!!
Where i am going to be spending my weekend! Nuffin Do Me!
Long Time No See!!
Too long since i sat on this my wheely wheely chair to tap sweet-nothings into this my blog!
Missed you so dearly, but you must forgive me jor! Assignments & Exams won kill me finish... But now i am officially *drum roll please* A- 3rd-YEAR- STUDENT NURSE!!! *Applause please.. thank you* lol.. I de pull your leg, i must wait to see my grades, see if i pass there own version of JAM.. if by the grace of God i pass am then Glory be to God i don reach my final year of Nursing... Then after that.. we may be talking MSC's baby!! loll.. Anyway Anyway, no more exzitement... Wetin de happen for my world since you guy last heard from me?
Well i got my dress done by the taylor.. It was err Okkkaaayyyy.. dont mistake me my dear, it was nice but it wasn't EXACTLY wat i wanted u gerrit? I paid for this design and she sow me some design she formulated in her mind.. I won woze am at first but i say mek i manage am since the party was the next day and beggars no fit choose so yes oo.. i gave her the money in bitterness, infact from when i saw the dress i already don de squeeze face like mama jus finished slappin me and as she was babbling on about how i don't know style, how this is the latest design in the block, that she copied the design from something Rita Dominic was wearing in Ovation magazine, it took every single biblical memory verse that i learnt from nursery school upwards to stop me from landing one dirty slap on her face... i de tell you!! But after i got the dress i went to one shop like that, and did some quick quick DIY on it..there is NOTHING a black corset belt can not make look sexy & classy!! Soo i went to the party the next day with my girl Hannah, my mumzie, and my bobo.. we de think that Lincolnshire (the party place) was just 2 hrs away...... *silence*..... O Boi!.. 4..FREAKIN..HOURS!!!!! After we don pass sign post that was showin' Birmingham my mama won turn back lol but it was too late.. my mumsie sef the drive like mad man who purchased there driving licence from one driving school for village, louis had to remind her several times that we were not in Lagos wer we could just drive like one skalliwag.. in this country they had something called a "speeding limit" .. we nearly died atleast 3 times in the whole journey but i thank God for mercy journeys.. Soo we arrived for the place.. i must say it was nothing like the dirty roads of london, Lincolnshire... even the sound of the place sounds like a place oyingbo people don clean up finish, a correct place with correct people not the usual crazy people you catch for peckham high street giving you business card to visit there "spiritual shrine".. (e go shock you, peckham na buisness headquarters for native doctors) ... The party itself was good, met some old faces.. some i missed.. some i didn't , you kno how it is.. Then after we don belle full we ventured once more to that journey back home that could possibly kill us lol..
Wot else don happen for ma world..
I finished my assignments early this week.. so as i was in a deep sleep trying to regenerate my energy when my boyfriend wake me up early.. "Ahn Ahn!! Wetin de happen?!?!" anyone u talk to would tell u i am an angry sleeper, "They don kill Bin Ladin!" he shouted *silence*..."Oooo louis, if dis na joke mek u tell me now now oo! u de mek me vex! i de warn you o!!" Then with just one click to CNN..my doubts were quieted .. The News brought soo many mixed feelings.. both Gladness and Anger and to some smalllllllll extent pity .. but wot it made me realize is that no body.. not Former president Abacha, not Michael Jackson or even the worlds greatest player of the game Hide & Seek- Osama BinLadin could HIDE from Death... When God say your time don reach,you go die.. even Jesus had to die.. except he conquered death and as a result resurrected.. but wot it made realized is this.. You can work sutttaaayyyy you become multi billionaire or maybe you may even be the most famous or most feared person in this world.. but like yam, one day u go rotten and people go troway you.. once your dead it only the legacy u keep that would live on.. would they remember you as that girl that was a Serious Amebo... or that boy that was crippled with konji that all he knew was sex or that man that decided that he would kill 3thousand people because a few of them mek him vex...
Think about your LEGACY, u de prepare am now!
Whether you believe me or not, God deh.. and God deh watch una .. and one day one day God go judge us.. if u be arm robber, repent.. if u be gossiper, stop.. if you be area boy, go to school!
Love You People!!
Keep Prayin! Satan no get power.. God Na Oga Patta Patta for this town!!!
My dear i don see her!! 2 blogs ago i tell you bout my taylor who i wori immigration or bailiffs don carry go. I wan fear that i go see her for Nothing to Declare as they troway her back for naija... Mek i remind you.. one of my sistaz mumzie de celebrate her 50th birthday BIG STYLE! And you know Yoruba people, when de wan do something deh go do am LAGOS PARTY KINDA WAY... so me now, wan do my own efizii.. mek dem kno I DON ARRIVE!! But see me see trouble now my taylor who de sow my clothes vanish like Banjee..like one kind Wintch.. i no find am! I don look for her faarr and wiiideee.. from asking people from church to going to that dirty place they call peckham .. i no see am at all at alllll!! I sent my bros to go hunt her down.. see me see trouble.. i even call home office and ask to see if them maga's don send her back home... no luck there ohh.. i couldn't even reveal much to them incase i sparked any unwanted attention.... Na so i see am my dear.. i don even taya for the woman, i already settle my mind for black maxi which by the time i try am on e no fit me like i thought before... so by this point my dreams of doing guuuyyy for dem people in the party don travel down guttah.. i was mentally preparing myself to look wowo! And i planed to make wowo look classy some how.. but lo & behold the woman called me today... As i looked down on my caller ID and saw her name "Kobo legged taylor" i nearly cried for joooyy!!! Baba God good oh!!! If anyone says Prayer no work, may God hammer dem!! 2days ago i had prayed fervveennttllyyy.. i no go liiee you, i prayed one of dem Mountain of Fire prayers that all my Enemies of fashion progress should be seeing me for night until they release to me my fashion blessing, Any plans that wan make me look wowo should DIE BY FIRE, DIE BY FIRE, DIE BY FIRE (x 7) or become blessings for me instead... so na me be this! Tank God for me ohhh!!
Anyyyyyyyy wayyyyy... No be my fashion miracle i wan speak to you about today my people, Wetin i wan talk about relates to a topic that your papa probably de discuss every night and i'm sure you would have noticed that channels such as NTA News is on more often... well firstly like i said 2 blogs ago, mek una listen to this song... e go get you in the right kinda mood...
Soo by the end of today everyone of our bruvas and sistas would have finish voting for our president..
Wetin Consine you? Abi? Well, one thing i know, from times of our great granpapa we don de woze Nigerian politician suuttttttaaayyy it has so much become an expectation... a Self-fulfilled prophecy... that Nigeria na corrupt place.. that Nigerian politicians na YeYe people.. that nothing good can come out of Nigerians.. O boi we don wooozzzzeee Nigerians taya!! We are probably the only people that de curse our OWN nation!! Afghans de enjoy, Indians de enjoy, Chinko de enjoy... but we de pour out curses upon curses for our own country... Our parents have indoctrinated us to believe that nigeria na worse than hell fire to the point that our generations and the ones below us do not see the need to go nigeria.. My brother wan turn his Nigerian name to William or Wilson.. This one no be Facebook name exchange ohh, when person like Adesola Oshilaja now turn his name to Dez Jacobs.. Adesola would want people to call him just Dez... This one wetin i talk is LEGAL NAME CHANGE, were no even Nigerian Embassy go recognize you anymore..
Nigeria isss messed up but what do you expect when we no go pray for our homeland..
I said it 2008 and i shall say it again 2011.. They shall coommmee a time, when Mr Cameron go send alllllll our black ynash back to that Nigeria we don spit on finish! I PROMISEyou!! Infact look at how thing de go now... Mr Cameron with his ethnocentric beliefs go send us all back home... even if you carry Britico passport e no go matter... Unless you are of the same skin of Mama Chale (Prince Charles Mother) your not as british as your primary school teacher said you weree... You carry AFRICAN BLOOD...yourbones no go swim like oyinbo cus you be DUDU!!With that understanding mek una pray for our land.. As they elect the new presido for naija town mek una pray HARD!! Fast & Pray!! Corruption is a thing of the devil, no be God's idea... So unless you pray, when they go carry us back home we go see wohala (you de laugh me now, but e go shockk you)...
As for me i am voting in spirit.. GOODLUCK JONATHAN... His name says it all.. Nigeria needs all the luck it could get.
The way this blog thing just de keep me up thinkin of wat to write sutttaayyy sleep no catch me, so this mornin i wan vex for anyone who wan wake me up.
But my gasshhh, i have become the ultimate blog master!! May God forgive anyone who didn't tell me how fun this blog thing is, e b like i de smoke eegbo! ADDICTIVE!!
In facccttt mek i gist you small, last night i uploaded one gadget like dat, wetin de call am? Flag counter or Visitor calculator, anyhow the gadget na ddiiiiieeeee mehn… it counts how many people has viewed my page. Small me of yesterday, that only had one view from my dearest friend ShayShay just de hammer plenty plenty views to the point wer now as I de talk my blog has been viewed58times… O boi, I wan piss for body wen I see am! I was so egzited,, Naija inlove is getting Famous…
but check this, the gadget showed me that one person from ICELAND don see my page!!! O boi I neva knew dudu man don reach Iceland oh! If not black man maybe e be one nice oyinbo like that that has interest in Naija lifestyles and finds naija blogs “educating”… you kno, like how we de watch Animal channel in order to educate us.. Oga or Madame if na you, no mind me ohhh… not all naija's de speak like me, no start to de think that all naija’s speak like one Christmas goat dat no read book, naija’s are actually very articulate, if they grammertize for you, you go feeaarrr!! So abeg ohh, no blame me… My school too like to strike and when they are open I no fit “please” lecturers cuz I be Christian so passing my JAM na fairy tale…
Anyway, you know when you wan sleep after work and your man just de sweet talk you taya… da maga de romance you and call you all the none sense lies that he told you wen you guys 1st met, “Sweerat you too fine!” “Sweet Potatoe, your so luscious”… he no kno that when wind blow fowl ynash go open and you know wassup.. You close your eyes hoping that common sense would finally konk him for head, but at this point his brain don jump on okada to travel down south.. (Btw, this should only happen in marriage oh)… He go rub your back thinking that one na wetin you want… you still ignore.. infact by the way he de look at you, you go feeeeaaarrrr! Wetin de do this one? E be like say his konji don intefer with his eye sight cus the way he looks at you, you wori he go confuse your body for eguisi and your head for Isi Ewu (goat head)... As he grins at you, you see the shaki from lunch wer tooth pick refused to locate ... he now carry himself from bed to put a CD on.. plays you guys songgg, the one wer you guys danced to when you first met, Boyz2Men? African Queen nko? Or if you guys met for ajegunle he may even play one Daddy Showkey song like dat.. Love song is in the ears of the beholder abi?
Anywayss this does the trick and you manage to totorize yourself inorder to ehh… “Submit”? to this mumu you call your bobo …My point is music puts you in the mood… so in that case before I go into my next part mek una listen to this song…
Did I mention that I am OBSSEEESSSEEDDD with WEDDINGS!!
That one na me.. just imagine that bride as me.. its simple if you squint lol
My friends think I de craze but na bad belle de worri them… I just loovvee them.. no be my fault, i too de watch Four Weddings butttt still mehn.. by the grace of God I shall marry one day..one day… one day soon *hehe* and before then I have dedicated my spare time to drooling over wedding ideas, wedding dresses ect ect… even to the point of my Tradi! It has to be ON POINT!!!
Oooo i like this flower bunch
Let me gist you.. Thiss picture is my SCREEN SAVER- I just LOOOVVVEEE it!! the dress, the lighting, the veil.. even how the brides maid in da pink de look at the bride with bad belle lol
I love this her hair..she style am well well
My Peoppllleeesss
Basket mouth no get shame.. your wedding day and you still de carry dada for head kmt
Ah Ahh! Nice cake sha, but wetin dey put inbetween.. holy communion .. looks like it to me
As you can see.. i like purple & white *hint hint*
My Peopppleee- Edo traditional wedding wear
Ekpami Oh!! The man who by the grace of God get me something just like that-- REAL GOLD.. DIAMONDS IN CARATS!! God will blesss you. Una shine your eyesss ohh.. Dat ring wetin you see there na my owwwnn personal bridal price lol.. *not including my mumzies requirements of: £600,000, 150 male goats, 80 boxes of yam, 20 boxes of plantain, 7 suitcase of lace, 12 pairs of matching shoe and bag, 12 barrels of palm wine, 2 Ghana must go bags full of cola nut and a personal Boeing Airplane where my mumsie could use travel to Nigeria without saving money for 3years before every visit ..* Why you de squeeze face, you wan mek my hand land on your face?!? If Loreal is worth it, ME TO I AM WORTH IT
As you can see, wen my own turn reach, with my ideas and PhD on wedding planning lol.. my own one shall have wetin i call- Efiziii!! Glitz and Glam Glam!! Just money de yab me... Plus i still want to prepare for the hard bit- the marriage..*long pause as you hear the birds tweeting away* .... Abeg Joh!! Nothing de do me!! Virtuous wifey you de look at already. don't watch that! loll
Abeg make i go, you people will not allow me to rest no more!!
6000 words assignment de wait for me in the Library ..
Bye Bye oh!.. Don't talk to no Area Boy before deh go use charm & mumu you finish
Despite previous experience in Event planning & wedding consultations i decided that it was about time that i made it into a business.
